the question isn't were you challenged

in high school, two weeks is an eternity.

and in my last two weeks, i have lost more sleep than you could ever imagine and seen God sweep through my life and make my day worth something. i guess i truly am blessed. we have conversations about being on auto-pilot, and i am blessed to be able to say that i haven't been having that problem that much. God has made things easy. God threw out lust and He cleaned me up for relationships and laid down a path. in Hallway and DFC and Thirty Hour Famine and Botball and He's made me a leader. and He gave me guidance today on how to use it, speaking through mike:

mike talked about how Moses was God's servant and, when the Israelites were delivered out of slavery, they wandered for some 40 years looking for the Promised Land and some left, but most people didn't. most people kept on following Moses because they could tell that Moses was with God - they could tell that there was a real relationship going on there, and they must have felt somehow that Moses was in the right, doing whatever it is he was doing.

he talked about how, when you are truly being who you have been called to be, Christ is exalted, and Christ enters into the atmosphere and changes things. mike talked about how our attitude should just be very real, and that it should be who we really are in Christ - not what it should look like and we don't exactly have to be doing anything, what is more important is who we are. and simply by being who we are, God gets the glory, and God changes people when He enters into environments. simply by really having an attitude of "Jesus loves you and deserves you because He died for you and He is worthy," that it is not even so much what you do, but who you are that sometimes makes the bigger difference.

i was in the wrong thinking about the youth group as a whole. i was kinda mad because it's been so hard to get any kind of focus, and we can't even stop long enough to listen to each other. and i was mad because i thought if God just showed up, and swept right through that house, people would miss it. and i justified it because i wasn't thinking about myself, i was worrying about people. and that is wrong, because it's not about people, it's about God. so i was mad at people and wanted to change them. this is a paraphrase of what i wrote after listening to mike talk:

"Don't worry about other people. Think about yourself and let God shine through you. When you are right with God, He will show Himself, and He will change atmospheres. He will get what He wants - so don't worry about them missing it. THink about yourself and make sure God gets you, and that God can use you to get others."

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led DFC this morning, talking about the Revival Hymn video. went through a long day (yes! the days are finally long again. not that my exhaustion is any justification. it's just nice to feel sometimes, though dangerous) and got back home. Friday night Bible study and now some sleep. that will be great. God be lifted high.